From Father Christmas to Scepticism : How I Learned to Stop Believing, and the Song It Sparked - “Illusions”

When you are a child, you believe what you are told.

Why wouldn’t you?

Your parents are the first people you trust. They teach you what the world is, how it works and what is safe. They tell you about the Tooth Fairy, Father Christmas and all the small pieces of magic that make childhood feel bigger than it really is. You do not question it. You accept it because the people telling you are the people you depend on.

That trust continues into school. Teachers tell you what is right and wrong. They explain history, science and the world around you. You listen because they are the adults in the room. Then you start believing other figures of authority too: policemen, politicians, doctors and people who are presented as important or knowledgeable.

I did.

I was a good kid at school. I believed that following the rules mattered. I believed that adults generally knew what they were doing. I believed that if people had authority, they must have earned the right to be trusted.

As I got older, that began to change.

The world around me changed. My understanding of people changed. Things I had accepted as facts started to look more complicated. Promises were made and broken. People said one thing and did another. The news, social media and everyday life all seemed to offer different versions of reality.

Eventually, I became sceptical of everything and everyone.

That is where “Illusions” came from.

The beliefs we inherit

The first verse of the song looks back at the beliefs I had as a child. They are not all literal beliefs. Some are emotional beliefs. They are the ideas that make the world seem secure.

I believed my dad was as strong as Superman. I believed my mum could make everything better. I believed my family was unbreakable and that we would always be there together.

Most children probably carry some version of those beliefs. Parents are not supposed to seem vulnerable when you are young. They are the people who fix problems, answer questions and make fear disappear. You do not see the pressure they are under. You only see the protection they provide.

Then you reach a point where you understand that your parents are human. They can struggle. They can get things wrong. They can become tired, ill or uncertain. Family can be strong, but it is not invincible. Nothing lasts forever.

That realisation is part of growing up. It is not necessarily a betrayal. It is simply a more complicated truth than the one you started with.

School, success and the stories we tell ourselves

The song also deals with the things I believed about school and success.

That is another kind of illusion. We are often given simple versions of success when we are young. Work hard and everything will be fine. Find the right opportunity and money will follow. Become talented enough and recognition will arrive.

Real life does not work that neatly.

Hard work matters, but it does not guarantee a particular result. Talent matters, but it does not remove bad luck or difficult circumstances. Money can improve some parts of life, but it cannot protect anyone from every loss. Success is not a permanent state. Neither is failure.

Writing songs has taught me this in a practical way. I started The Buey Project without formal musical training. I did not know where it would lead. I only knew I had something I needed to express.

There was no guarantee that anyone would listen. There still isn’t. But the act of writing became more important than the promises I had absorbed about what success was supposed to look like.

When trust reaches politics

The second verse moves from childhood and personal ambition into wider ideas about society.

I used to believe voting would get you what you wished. I believed politicians would make promises and then have to deliver them. I believed war was something that happened on the television, somewhere distant and separate from ordinary life. I believed there would be peace forever.

I do not see those things in the same way now.

This is not about saying that every politician is dishonest or that every public institution is useless. It is about recognising that authority does not automatically equal truth. A title, uniform or public platform does not make someone right.

Promises need to be examined. Claims need to be questioned. Policies need to be judged by their consequences rather than their presentation. Voting matters, but it is not a magic solution. Democracy is more complicated than selecting a name and expecting the world to change immediately.

The same applies to the news and social media. We are surrounded by information, but information is not always understanding. A headline can create an impression before the facts have been checked. A repeated claim can start to feel true simply because it has been repeated often enough.

That connects “Illusions” with “Free”. Both songs come from the same place of questioning what we are shown and what we are encouraged to accept. The difference is that “Free” focuses more directly on the pressure of modern media and public opinion, while “Illusions” follows the journey back to where that questioning began.

The belief that life is fair

The final part of the second verse deals with fairness, religion and karma.

I used to believe that you get out of life what you put in. I believed God was real and karma would punish the sinner. I believed life was fair. If we were good, I believed we would be healthy forever.

Those are comforting ideas.

They suggest that the world has a system behind it. Good behaviour receives a reward. Bad behaviour receives a punishment. Suffering has a reason. Health and security can be protected by living correctly.

But life does not always follow that pattern. Good people suffer. Cruel people sometimes prosper. Hard work can go unnoticed. Illness can arrive without warning. Some events cannot be explained by fairness or personal responsibility.

That does not mean kindness is pointless. It does not mean people should stop trying to do the right thing. It means the world does not owe us a clear explanation for everything that happens.

Losing those beliefs can feel like losing protection. It can also create a more honest foundation. Instead of expecting the world to reward me automatically, I have to decide what I believe and how I want to live.

“It’s just an illusion”

The chorus is deliberately direct:

Does it even matter
I know it’s just chatter
It’s just an illusion
To create the confusion

Don’t believe all you see
Don’t believe all you hear
Choose your path
Live your life your own way

The word “illusion” does not mean that every experience is fake. It means that appearances can be misleading. Stories can be constructed. People can be influenced by fear, repetition and expectation.

The chorus is not telling anyone to reject everything. It is not an instruction to assume that every person is lying. It is a reminder to think for yourself.

There is a difference between scepticism and cynicism. Cynicism can lead to the belief that nothing matters and nobody can be trusted. Scepticism leaves room for evidence, change and better answers.

I still change my mind when I find a reason to. That is not weakness. It is part of trying to be honest.

The important line for me is “Choose your path”. Once you stop accepting every belief handed to you, you are left with responsibility. You cannot blame your parents, teachers, politicians or anyone else for every decision. You have to consider what you have been told, compare it with what you see and decide what you are prepared to stand behind.

Why I wrote “Illusions”

“Illusions” is about the loss of childhood innocence, but it is not only a sad song. There is sadness in discovering that the world is less safe and less fair than you thought. There is also freedom in no longer needing every answer to come from someone else.

The song follows the movement from trust to doubt:

Parents. Teachers. Authority. Politics. Religion. Money. Fairness.

Each belief begins as something simple. Each one becomes more complicated with age.

I do not think the answer is to believe nothing. That would be another form of surrender. The answer is to remain alert. Listen carefully. Check what you can. Accept that your own view may be incomplete. Do not let anyone else choose your entire path for you.

That is the message I wanted to leave in the song.

Do not believe all you see. Do not believe all you hear. Decide for yourself. Live with the consequences. Keep moving forward.

This song is a little more pop sounding but If you enjoy indie music, alternative rock and songwriting built around real experiences, you can listen to more from The Buey Project on the official YouTube channel.